31 December 2007

Next Monday, 31 December 2007, I'll be going in for a caesarean at 12:30pm. Finally, I can tell people exactly when baby is arriving! Countless ones have been asking when is baby coming, and now I can finally put a date to it!

After gynae visit yesterday, we decided that if baby doesn't arrive naturally by 31 December, I'll go for elective C-sect as baby is growing too big. Baby's estimated size as of yesterday was about 3.2kg. And based on previous experience with Janelle, baby will probably continue to grow exponentially in these last few weeks.

My hopes of ever having a natural delivery are all gone, but trusting that God has His perfect plan for us.  The good thing about a planned caesarean is that you can really plan everything. Royston has even so kindly helped me borrow several Reader's Digest books to kill time while counting down to the New Year all by myself in hospital. Will have to deliver at Mt Elizabeth instead of Mt Alvernia (our preferred choice) as my gynae's schedule is too packed to rush to Mt A for my surgery. Considering that I'd be bedridden at least for 1 day after surgery, I'm sure the Reader's Digest will come in handy! Still, the thought of being alone in hospital located in the heart of Orchard Road, unable to get out of bed, on a New Year's Eve where everyone's out celebrating - is really not too appealing. But I guess the Lord gave me this unique privilege for me to spend this special time with Him alone with undivided attention as I cross over the new year! New Year's Eves are always spent with lots of loved ones and friends surrounding you, but I will have the awesome privilege of spending it with my Master and Lord alone. How blessed I am!

So much to be thankful for!

It has been a really unexpected Christmas season for us.

For one, we thought that we would have 2 little girls to celebrate Christmas with, but seems like no.2 is still contented to stay in the womb. With that in mind, we did not manage to put much effort to invite any friends or family for all the Christmas outreach events.

Yet, despite our lack of effort, or rather, lack of planning, God engineered situations such that we had divine appointments! Managed to invite my father-in-law to the Hokkien service on Saturday, as well as invited 2 friends to the Christmas service on Sunday.

The most amazing thing is how God is doing a mighty work in my father-in-law's heart! He was unexpectedly alone at home on Saturday, and unexpectedly called us, so we invited him to come to our place. And then he brought Janelle down to the Zhenghua carnival, and unexpectedly wanted to go to church for the health screening, and then Royston decided to casually invite him for the Hokkien service that evening, and he unexpectedly agreed! Well, at least to us, it all seemed so unexpected. But I'm sure that to God, it was all engineered by Him!

He was really touched by the sermon at the Hokkien service, and has been raving about it to us and other family members! We believe that he actually did say the sinner's prayer at the Hokkien service, but was just too shy to admit it.

Yesterday my father invited my father-in-law on a last minute basis to his church's evangelistic service, and surprisingly my father-in-law went! My dad says that my father-in-law is very near to accepting Christ already, and we're really praying against the devil's schemes and praying that God will continue to do His mighty work!

Looking at how far he has come (in terms of religion), we can only give thanks to God for working in His time. For we did nothing, but it was all engineered by God. All we need to do is to avail ourselves and our resources, and to work hand in hand with God!

All I want for Christmas is Baby Janine

Yesterday, I went for my gynae check-up at 37weeks 2 days. I had put on 700g in the past 2 weeks! And I was wondering where did this 700g go to? When gynae did the scan of the baby, he said that baby Janine now weighs about 2.9 - 3.0kg, as compared to 2.3kg two weeks ago. My worst fears came true...the 700g all went to baby Janine! And she seems to be growing at an exponential rate!

For Janelle, at 38 weeks => 3.0kg
When she popped at 39 weeks => 3.6kg (birthweight)

For Janine, at 37 weeks 2 days => 3.0kg
When she pops...=> ? kg

Hmm...what does logical deduction tell you??

Can't help but feel discouraged that my hopes of having a natural delivery this time round are slowly diminishing with each passing day that Janine stays in the womb. Gynae also said that the earlier Janine arrives, the better the chance of a natural birth, if not she might just grow too big for me to deliver her naturally.

I've been asking myself why am I so hard up for a natural birth? After all, most people would say that as long as mother and baby are healthy, that's the most important thing. True, I agree, but I can't help but want to experience how it's like to deliver naturally. And it irks me that the only reason why I may end up in a C-section again is because baby is too big! (blame Royston's genes!!). Yet I try to console myself that there are greater and more important issues at hand, like reaching out to our friends with the love of God this Christmas, like world evangelisation, etc etc. Whether or not I end up with a natural birth or caesarean seems like such a minute concern beside all these other issues!

Still, we will continue to pray that Janine will arrive by Christmas, and that the Lord will grant a smooth and efficient natural delivery. Guess that's what our faith is about - a delicate balance between clinging on to that glimmer of hope, yet at the same time saying to the Lord that "I surrender all". We can only rest in the blessed assurance that God knows what is BEST for us!

Awaiting Janine's arrival

Being 36 weeks pregnant is simply boring. Several normal day-to-day activities have become increasingly difficult, if not near-impossible, due to my huge tummy. These include:
- Sitting cross-legged on the floor
- Crossing your legs when you sit down
- Drying your legs after a bath
- Cutting toenails
- Tossing or turning on the bed

We're all eagerly awaiting Janine's arrival. Even Janelle has been patting my tummy everyday and kissing it! She'll happily point to my tummy and say "this is mei-mei". And when asked what's mei-mei's name, she'll proudly say "na-neen!" (she can't pronounce the "ja" sound so it comes out as "na" instead). As for now, while Janine is still in the womb, Janelle is a very good older sister, though I think the jealous side of Janelle will show when Janine is finally out into the world!

Our concerns are so different while awaiting the arrival of our 2nd child, as compared to when we had our 1st child. Before Janelle came, we were concerned how we would cope, whether would breastfeeding come easy, how to change diapers, etc etc. Now, all these seem like "small concerns" while awaiting Janine's arrival. Our greater concern is how would Janelle react to Janine's presence?? Would she be really jealous and become a difficult kid? Would she demand our attention even more? etc etc. And of course, how would we cope when both our kids cry at the same time? Oh well, but I guess things will somehow work out. We will all have to learn together

Right now, we're just praying for:
- a natural delivery (after Janelle arrived by emergency C-sect, I'm really hoping to try for a natural birth this time round)
- efficient labour and smooth delivery
- Janine to arrive by Christmas or earlier (so that Royston will have some time with her before school reopens in January, and so that the agonising wait will be shortened!)

Trusting God to answer these prayers according to His good will!